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Reesa Teesa’s ‘Who TF Did I Marry’ & The Highs & Lows Of Oversharing On TikTok

Actual life has at all times been lots stranger than fiction. Netflix, Hulu, and Tubi’s scripted catalogs can simply take a backseat to the unbelievable true tales mined instantly from the on a regular basis lives displayed freely on social media platforms. However one nightmarish actuality has taken over TikTok within the final week that isn’t simply an entertaining thrill experience — full with head-scratching confusion, hair-raising suspense, and a sprinkle of sarcastic, “Lady, no he didn’t?!” comedy — but in addition a stark reminder of the perils that accompany oversharing private tales on social media.

On Valentine’s Day, TikToker Reesa Teesa started her “Who TF Did I Marry” collection, a 50-part, eight-hour string of storytime TikTok movies that rapidly went viral. In every 10-minute clip, Reesa candidly recounted a chronological firsthand account of assembly, relationship, marrying, and ultimately divorcing a narcissist and pathological liar. The aim of Reesa sharing such darkish days, listeners would be taught all through, was to assist individuals who could also be in the same scenario and “to inform my story and to inform it detailed and so as,” she stated. Very quickly, hundreds of thousands of customers devoured every half like banned audiobooks on the black market, admitting that Reesa’s FYP-friendly expertise had change into the thrilling soundtrack to their most mundane duties like washing dishes and commuting to work.

@reesamteesa Who TF Did I Marry- Introduction #reesateesa #fyp #collection ♬ authentic sound – ReesaTeesa

So who’s Reesa? And who TF did she marry? 

In keeping with Reesa, she is an Atlanta-based content material creator and 9-to-5er whose whirlwind romance with a person she calls Legion (a nickname she gave him to cover his id) started in the course of the Covid-19 pandemic in March 2020. After their first few cellphone calls and a primary date that just about didn’t occur — till Legion confirmed up like a white knight to repair the tire she blew on her approach to see him — she was smitten with the previous soccer participant and divorced company exec who she believed was romantic and will present financially. Inside months, Legion moved in with Reesa into her townhouse and so they had been pregnant. 

Amidst the leisure worth, cautionary undertones nonetheless emerge.

Quickly after, the 2 started home looking, a course of that may instantly sound Reesa’s inside alarm bells. They might put in all-cash affords and Legion couldn’t produce the proof of funds mandatory to shut any offers. His lack of honesty and monetary stability confirmed up once more when he promised, she claims, that he would purchase her a automotive and have it delivered.

The automotive by no means got here. They usually by no means purchased a home. Ultimately, she had a miscarriage for which he was largely absent due to his hectic work schedule. Regardless of the pink flags Reesa admits she ignored and her continued suspicion, the couple married in January 2021. Whereas she wasn’t utterly glad, she believed he was VP of a condiment firm, that he spoke to his brother each single morning earlier than work, and that he was married solely as soon as earlier than.

It wasn’t till her divorce, after just a few brief months of marriage, that she realized Legion had fabricated his complete life: He wasn’t well-off. He wasn’t a VP however a short lived forklift operator. He was married greater than as soon as. And maybe most disturbingly, he lied concerning the loss of life of members of the family and solely pretended to talk along with his household over the cellphone — he was speaking to himself.

“Legion by no means beloved me,” Reesa says of the realizations she has had for the reason that divorce. “Each single day, he lied to me.”

Reesa is the Zola of 2024’s timeline

Reesa’s story is what Lifetime film offers are manufactured from, and her newfound followers are hopeful she’ll get profitable alternatives for her openness. However Reesa’s collection of unlucky occasions isn’t the primary stranger-than-fiction story to hit Beyoncé’s web. 

In 2015, Aziah “Zola” Wells turned Twitter the other way up along with her viral 148-tweet thread a few quick-cash street journey to Tampa with a good friend. The unbelievable story was the primary of this sort of storytelling and later turned an A24 movie concerning the risks of quick friendship, the intricacies of intercourse work, and darkly fascinating truths.

The attract in all these tales is the storytelling prowess. In each Reesa and Aziah’s tales, digital platforms became digital amphitheaters, the place customers eagerly awaited the subsequent chapter of their emotional rollercoasters. But, amidst the leisure worth, cautionary undertones nonetheless emerge.

It is a prime instance of how the web works — the second a narrative is within the fingers of the folks clamoring for it, it’s not yours to manage. 

Did Reesa’s sharing go too far?

In a digital panorama the place authenticity is each revered and commodified, Reesa’s choice to put naked the intimate particulars of her marriage poses an vital query: How a lot is an excessive amount of to share on-line? The partaking nature of her content material could inadvertently encourage others to comply with go well with, but it surely has additionally inspired onlookers to share particulars Reesa would have in any other case appreciated to maintain underneath wraps. 

For instance, since Reesa realized of Legion’s con, she hasn’t had any contact with him expressing, “I ain’t seen him, I ain’t heard from him, I don’t wanna hear from him” within the collection’ Introduction / Disclaimer. However that didn’t cease fellow TikToker Danni H from revealing Legion’s actual id to hundreds of thousands of customers’ displeasure. Although Reesa seemingly needed to place some protections in place earlier than Legion’s actual identify (Jerome McCoy) got here to mild, as she alluded to in a TikTok, it is a prime instance of how the web works — the second a narrative is within the fingers of the folks clamoring for it, it’s not yours to manage. 

Oversharing private traumas on-line seems weak, genuine, and good for psychological well being within the social media age, in keeping with Affiliate Professor of Psychology Simon Boag. “There’s new worth in vulnerability and spilling your guts,” he writes. “It’s what some are calling contagious vulnerability, and a part of a brand new language of psychological self-care.” 

Whereas opening up on the web can definitely be therapeutic and entice people who relate, it can also make anybody prone to doxxing, cyberbullying, and cyberstalking. There’s no approach to monitor the movement of data, simply as Reesa couldn’t keep her ex’s privateness. Customers, whether or not they benefit from the content material or not, can take any tidbit talked about in a video and comply with breadcrumbs to private data like dwelling addresses, members of the family’ names, and employment particulars. 

In keeping with trauma therapist Shannon Thomas advised Enterprise Insider, trauma dumping, or unloading traumatic experiences on others with out warning, which is frequent on TikTok, may also result in secondary trauma. “Trauma dumping creates an open door for a survivor to be additional harmed if their expertise is met with a harsh or essential response from others on-line,” Thomas stated.

Nonetheless, Reesa’s intent to assist these going through related struggles is commendable, and her transparency undoubtedly resonated with an enormous viewers, however the hazard inherent in sharing private tales on platforms like TikTok lies within the unforeseeable penalties. Legion is mentally unstable, and this sort of publicity (and embarrassment) might set off him to hurt Reesa. These are issues that leisure junkies on-line don’t at all times cease to think about. 

What’s the lesson from Who TF Did I Marry? (And the way a lot is it value?)

Whereas going viral for deep-diving into your darkest secrets and techniques can have its pitfalls, it could possibly additionally assist usher in main life wins. 

In keeping with TikTok, manufacturers like Delta and Hilton are sending Reesa to London and Paris, two cities she’d been dying to go to since her marriage. She’s additionally getting a BMW (the automotive Legion promised to purchase her)! And there’s overwhelming hypothesis that she’s raking in anyplace between $80,000 to $400,000 for the hundreds of thousands of TikTok views she’s garnering from her Legion troubles. Monetary entrepreneur and content material creator Jaystips steered Reesa’s new riches primarily based on view rely, video runtimes, particulars about TikTok’s creator program, and different frequent platform processes. “A few of her movies are near 10 minutes lengthy, and often platforms pay extra the longer your movies. So if TikTok [does] the identical and pay you extra the longer your video, realistically she may very well be making $4 or $5 per 1000 views. That may very well be virtually $400,000 for this collection.”

As we eat content material that blurs the boundaries between actuality and leisure, it’s essential to replicate on the potential repercussions of laying naked the intricacies of our lives.

That type of incomes potential is the attract of being weak on-line, however the largest takeaway is to be aware whereas doing so. As we eat content material that blurs the boundaries between actuality and leisure, it’s essential to replicate on the potential repercussions of laying naked the intricacies of our lives. Whereas the attract of going viral could also be tempting, the lasting influence on private well-being and relationships requires cautious consideration in a world the place social media is each a stage and a possible minefield.

Fortunately for Reesa, Legion has solely responded on TikTok, so far as followers know. His first ex-wife LaToya Averett and his stepson Tashawn Lopes additionally shared their sides of the story.

“If only one girl watches these movies and she or he’s like, ‘You already know what? One thing don’t sit proper with me. Let me look into this,’ then it was value it.”

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